Worn Out No Longer

And my prayers are wearing thin
I’m worn even before the day begins
I’m worn I’ve lost my will to fight
I’m worn so heaven come and flood my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart that’s frail and torn
I want to know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause I’m worn

~ “Worn” by Tenth Avenue North

I have been feeling so worn out recently. I love my job, I love people, I love serving, I love helping, but recently it’s been tough. From the time I awake until I go to bed at night, I have to fight and try so hard to keep a good attitude and serve with a smile on my face.

It’s because I see so much pain on a daily basis, so much hurt, and so many times I just don’t know what to do, it’s tiring.

I needed a vacation. Continue reading

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Hymns

This is an older post of mine, but a topic I’ve been thinking about for a while and rather than rehash it out again, I figured it would be better to just bring this post back to the forefront of my blog…

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Can I just say I love hymns? The style is older, but I love the words, so many of them have some of the best words for worship songs, but we don’t realize it because we get so focused on the fact that it is a hymn, and maybe it says thou and thee, but when you really stop to look at what is really being said, so many times they are so amazing, take “Be Thou My Vision” for instance, read and/or listen to the lyrics and really think about what it says… Continue reading

Ruined by Majesty

I’m falling at Your feet
Ruined by Your majesty

~ “Falling At Your Feet” by Among Thorns

This song is one I used to listen to all the time and have recently “rediscovered”, in fact, I blogged about it very early on, it was one of my first posts. But today, I want to revisit it.

This idea of being “Ruined by Your majesty”. What does that mean? And why does this fill us with such joy? Why does this make us want to press into God more? Continue reading

Be Still and Know…

When darkness comes upon you
And covers you with fear and shame
Be still and know that I’m with you
And I will say your name
~ “Be Still” by The Fray

This song has very quickly become one of my favorite songs.

When life is swirling around us. Our reaction is to want to run around like a chicken with our head cut off. We run around trying to get everything under control. We get stressed out, worried, and overwhelmed. But that isn’t the answer… Continue reading

The Old Blue Chair

“There’s a blue rockin’ chair,

sittin’ in the sand.

Weathered by the storms,

and well oiled hands.

It sways back and forth,

with the help of the winds.

Seems to always be there,

like an ol’ trusted friend.

 

I’ve read a lot of books, wrote a few songs.

Looked at my life, where it’s goin’, where it’s gone.

I’ve seen the world, through a bus windshield.

But nothing compares,

to the way that I see it,

to the way that I see it,

to the way that I see it,

when I sit in that Old Blue Chair.

 

From that chair I’ve caught

a few fish and some rays,

and I’ve watched boats sail,

in and out of Cinnamon Bay.

I let go of a lover,

that took a piece of my heart.

Prayed many times for forgiveness,

and a brand new start.

 

That chair was my bed one New Year’s night,

when I passed out from too much Malibu and diet,

and I woke up to a hundred mosquito bites. I swear.

Got ’em all sittin’ right there, in the Old Blue Chair.

 

There’s a blue rockin’ chair,

sittin’ in the sand.

Weathered by the storms,

and well oiled hands.”

~ “Old Blue Chair” By Kenny Chesney

I know many people don’t like country music, but I love country. I was listening to this song a while ago, and I thought to my self “wow, this song is so cool, it speaks to such an important idea” it speaks to the idea of an Old Blue Chair, that is, it speaks to having a place of solitude. You see, we all need to have an Old Blue Chair of our own somewhere. A place where we can sit and think. I love the lines from the chorus: I’ve read a lot of books, wrote a few songs. Looked at my life, where it’s goin’, where it’s gone. I’ve seen the world, through a bus windshield. But nothing compares, to the way that I see it, when I sit in that Old Blue Chair.”  And that is the idea I love of the Old Blue Chair, it is that place where when the world gets us down, when we need to re-evaluate our life, when we need to see the world differently we can go to.

So here is my question to you, do you have an Old Blue Chair somewhere? Do you have a place to go when the world is just more than you can take? At Devil’s Den in Gettysburg, there is a rock I called Pride Rock because it looked like Pride Rock from The Lion King. For the year that I was out there in Gettysburg Master’s Commission, that was my Old Blue Chair. When I had to just go and think and look at life, I would climb out there. It was a great spot because it was around people, but very few ever ventured out that far to climb, and the few that did were very respectful of my space. That was where I would go to pray, to work, to read, and sometime to just goof off. I want to encourage you guys to go and find/create our own Old Blue Chair somewhere. Maybe you are saying to yourself “but I don’t have anywhere I can go”, sometime just a corner of a room works, just a space set aside for prayer, or maybe you go walk a path at a park, or the track at school, or something like that, be creative, there are many Old Blue Chairs out there, you just have to look for them.

Celebrations (2 of 5)

Continuing my walk down the past year, and the posts that indicated a time of change in my life, this one was a no brainer for me. This one was from one the biggest shifts in my personal life, and was the beginning of a crazy time of change and a fair bit of turmoil.. Continue reading

Doubt Your Doubts

“Grow, grow where you are
Anchor your roots underneath
Doubt your doubts and believe your beliefs”
~ “Ode To Chin” by Switchfoot

What an interesting line that last one is. “doubt your doubts and believe your beliefs”. What does this mean? It seems ridiculous & confusing & yet obvious at the same time. (or maybe that’s just me, lol)
Continue reading

Reality Is A Lovely Place

“Reality is a lovely place but I wouldn’t want to live there.”
~ “The Real World” by Owl City

I have been thinking about this quote a lot recently. What does this mean? Do I agree with it? Is this a good outlook to have on life? But in the end, I came to the conclusion that I agree with this quote.
Continue reading

These are my Souvenirs

 

Here’s to the twilight
here’s to the memories
these are my souvenirs
~”Souvenirs” by Switchfoot

When you look around my room, you will find an assortment of so many random things. (seriously, ask my roommates, they’ll tell you). There’s a teddy bear, there’s poster with burnt paper, a jar of oil, an old style bullet, a can that had the side ripped open, a key, a pin to a grenade, a ship, some rocks, and I could go on and on.

Why do I have them? What is their purpose? to many people, these items are probably just a random collection of junk. But to me, every item is a memory, and more important than just a memory, it’s a memory of a person, and a life changed. Some are memories from my own life, a memory of a version of me in the past (some good, some bad). And some are memories of someone else’s life that I had the awesome chance to get to watch (and if I was really lucky, God let me play this little tiny part in).
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Vice Verses

The theme is “vice verses”. The concept behind that is the idea that rebirth is often birthed in struggle. So these are the verses that have been birthed through struggle, the “vice verses.”

~ Tim Foreman, Bassist from Switchfoot & brother to lead singer Jon Foreman

This is a simple, yet brilliant, idea. One that we often don’t really put together. Every rebirth is birthed out of pain. This can be such a hard concept to understand, and we find ourselves asking these questions

Where is God in the night sky?
Where is God in the city light?
Where is God in the earthquake?
Where is God in the genocide?

Continue reading