The following is an excerpt from my Prayer Journal today:
“February 12, 2009
What is it? What is it that you want from me? I have spent so much time before you, asking for a voice with words to speak, not just a voice that makes noise. But as I sit and pray, I hear nothing, no words form, just noise. When? When will the noise make sense? When will your words be spoken? How much longer do I have to wait? I feel like I have been waiting forever. I know that you say that when we ask, you give, but why, then, do I ask, and not receive? Or at least, don’t feel like I receive? If I have received, open my eyes to what you have given, so that I know that it is there. In the words of the song “I’m here to meet with you, come meet with me. I’m here to find you, reveal yourself to me.” God, I’m here, so why don’t I feel like you are here too? I feel like I’m doing this on my own, but yet, I know that isn’t true…”

As I’m praying and writing the last line posted here, the song “Every Breath” by Gateway Worship came on, and I don’t think it was a crazy random happenstance. I think God timed it right, because as I listened to it, God said “Joel, let this be your prayer…” So I’ve posted the song, but the lines that really jumped out at me I bolded & italicized:

Lord, You’re so amazing to me,
How can I find the words
To convey what Your love means,
I’d give all I have and more

In the times I am weak, You come rescue me
Through the words that You speak over me
From the depths of my soul
Lord, I want You to know
That this life that I live is for You

Every breath, Lord, all that I am
I want my life to bring You glory
Every moment, with all that I have
I want my life to bring You glory

Forever, I surrender

When I am weak, You rescue me, therefore, with every breath, with all that I am, with every moment, with everything I have, I want to praise You, and forever I’m surrendering to You.

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